The Devil Made Me Do It

[eveglass]

Double header! Over the course of the last two sessions, Our Heroes (tm) plotted, schemed, and pondered how they could get into the barricaded gold mine, only to settle for Plan F: Tactical Nuclear Orog. Because sometimes brute force is the right solution!


[The mining town of Lyssoria contains the Devil of Greed.]
Jace: "I bet you could make some money here, Baska!"
Baska/Julie: "Just wait until I fail my will save!"

[The PCs are staying at the Braided Beard, a dwarven tavern. The bartender is charging us exorbitant amounts.]
Eric: "He's not affected by the devil -- he's just a jerk."

[As part of our investigation, we check out a mining supplies store. It contains, among other things, canaries in cages.]
Robert the GM: "You walk in and hear chirping."
Julie: "Congratulations! The air in the shop is fit for breathing!"

[We're fairly certain that the Devil of Greed is somewhere inside the barricaded gold mine, being guarded by about a dozen dwarves. But how to get past them?]
Andrew: "The most simplistic plan ever: teleport ogre in the mine, let the problem handle itself."

[Our plan involves Gorka'munda running at the barricade and hoping that he makes the mother of all burst checks. This is what happens when you care about the mission objective more than you care about the lives of your characters.]
Eric: "We're not sure if you can break it, so just run at it as hard as you can."
Andrew: "That's the orc way!"

[Meanwhile, Baska has noticed a dwarf with a ring of reduce person. And she failed her will save against the Devil of Greed.]
Julie: "Remind me that I don't want to cut off his finger."

[Baska tries to enlist Jace in helping her get the ring.]
Jace: "It's the other guy's ring, though."
Baska: "...Well, technically."

[Having acquired the ring through non-violent means, we can now get back to the matter at hand. Andrew begins to have misgivings.]
Eric: (to Andrew) "Cheer up: the dwarves can only get you if you make it through the barricade."

[Next question: how to convince Gorka'munda to run at the barricade as hard as he can? Sometimes, the simplest way is best.]
Jace: "That wall said you were ugly."
Baska: "It said you were a namby-pamby elf."

[While placing some flasks of stonebreaker acid, Baska hears people beyond the barricade talking in a language she doesn't understand.]
Julie: "Does it sound like an evil language?"
Robert the GM: "What does an evil language sound like?"
Julie: "Well, guttural, maybe with hissing."
Eric: "So like Hebrew."
Robert the GM: "...I can confirm that they are not speaking Hebrew."

[Gorka'munda runs head-long at the wall and makes a burst check of 56, causing the barricade and quite a bit of the surrounding rock face to explode.]
Eric: "Congratulations. You not only broke the barricade, you broke the rules."

[The next step: convincing Gorka'munda to keep going into the mine instead of lying down to take a nap.]
Gorka'munda: "Gorka'munda has revenge on wall. Can go home now."
Baska: "But the devil's down there."
Jace: "And he built the wall."

[To navigate through the mine, Gorka'munda must wear Baska's recently-acquired ring of reduce person, making him a medium-sized creature.]
Jace: "I look you in the eye. This is weird."

[Further in the mine, we find dead, naked dwarves who were apparently killed by something piercing, at least several days ago. Even further, we hear people talking, again in a language no one understands.]
Andrew: "Did you memorize tongues?"
Eric: "Nope."
Andrew: "I hate you."
Eric: "Yup. But I can purify food and drink!"
Andrew: (deadpan) "Well, huzzah."

[Gorka'munda falls down a pit and gets his leg impaled on a spike. He starts screaming, which is probably attracting attention. Jace has an effective solution.]
Jace: "Gorka'munda, shut up or a shadow hand will eat you."


That's it for this time! Next time: our heroes start in on an honest-to-goodness dungeon crawl and maybe defeat the Devil of Greed! Yay!

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