URDR - Multiverse Defense

[eveglass]

The bad news is, URDR headquarters has been sucked towards the edge of Universe 1 and destroyed forever. The good news is, no more pesky TPS forms to fill out.


[As always, Anton Dregari has summoned an assistant in his magical researches. One must always be prepared to look the part.]
Sutart: "My demon will be wearing a lab coat."

[Eric the GM shows us a picture of URDR headquarters, which looks suspiciously like Babylon 5 mixed with Vorlon technology.]
Eric the GM: "If you can get technology from anywhere..."
Julie: "Why not Vorlon technology!"
Stuart: "Because it might eat you."
Julie: "Only if you're bad. It's like Santa that way."

[What begins as a normal day in URDR rapidly becomes somewhat... abnormal.]
Eric the GM: "The station begins shaking."
Julie: "That strikes me as the sort of thing it shouldn't be doing."

[As the station continues shaking...]
Eric the GM: "You're familiar with the feeling of impacts."
Julie: "Universe 1 isn't big enough for something to be outside impacting us!"

[Robert was not at this session, due to the unforgivable reason of being a new father. Sabina comes in about 5 minutes after we start.]
Anton Dregari: "Let's just find the others."
Fox: (suddenly appearing) "Where are we going?"
Anton Dregari: "...That was easy."

[We arrive at Command and Control, aka C&C, and flash our badges.]
Eric the GM: "They know who you are."
Stuart: "But we get to use our badges so infrequently!"
Eric the GM: (resigned) "You flash your badges."

[Yalia has a clearer image of the C&C view-screens than the others. Not that it's terribly illuminating.]
Anton Dregari: "What's going on?"
Yalia: "Looks like we're under attack."
Eric the GM: "It's crowded out there!"

[With nothing we can really do at C&C, we contact our handler, Lena Cereghetti.]
Anton Dregari: "Are there boarding parties?"
Lena Cereghetti: "It's just a matter of time, probably."
Anton Dregari: "Well, let us know. I wouldn't want to miss it."

[We try to figure out if there's anything we can do before the boarding parties arrive.]
Lena Cereghetti: "Can you survive in the vacuum of space?"
Yalia: "Yes!"
Anton Dregari: "Temporarily."

[We consider how a fleet of ships could even be transported to Universe 1 in the first place.]
Stuart: "I could transport them. I wouldn't do anything else for a week, and I'd need a few bodies..."

[Chaos begins erupting on the station.]
Julie: "It is a mark of Yalia's character growth that she is not using this situation as an opportunity to loot the zocalo."

[We go to Mission Control to see if there are other URDR agents with whom we can be useful.]
Stuart: "Is Vek'n around?"
Eric the GM: "Yes."
Stuart: "What's he doing?"
Eric the GM: "Standing around, wringing his hands."

[We ask Vek'n to accompany us as we attempt to Be Useful (tm). He agrees.]
Stuart: "Was Vek'n the right choice?"
Julie: "He's the one you chose."
Eric the GM: "And he won't die in a vacuum!"

[As we're in Mission Control, trying to figure out what's going on.]
Yalia: "I don't like standing around waiting."
Anton Dregari: "Me either."
Eric the GM: "Well, ask and you shall receive. Someone yells, 'Breaching pods incoming!'"

[We figure out where one of the breaching pods will hit.]
Eric the GM: "It's a site you can access before they breach."
Julie: "I can teleport at will. We can access any point before they breach."

[Anton Dregari tries to marshall more forces to go with us to the site of the imminent breach, but he's not having much luck.]
Eric the GM: "You're not a commanding officer. You're just one guy yelling among many."
Stuart: "Can I yell louder?"

[We prepare to meet the breaching pod's boarding party.]
Anton Dregari: "This ends badly in Star Wars."
Yalia: "How does it end in Star Wars?"
Anton Dregari: "All the defenders are slaughtered."
Yalia: "Oh. Let's not let that happen to us."

[The breaching pod makes contact and drills through the hull.]
Soldiers: (shouting) "Nidhogg!"
Sabina: "Do I know of any terrorist organizations who might be shouting that?"
Eric the GM: "Apparently yes! But previously no."

[Combat ensues.]
Julie: "My plan is to shoot them with my blaster pistol."
Sabina: "By an amazing coincidence, that's my plan too!"

[As combat is joined, Anton sends his demon into the fray.]
Stuart: "It goes without saying that Professor Imp is entirely expendable, but I'd like to keep the lab coat for the next demon to wear."

[Our enemies fight back! Kinda!]
Eric the GM: "They're shooting about as well as any stormtrooper."

[Also with us is Vek'n, a warforged cleric of Plaugg, God of Mediocrity.]
Eric the GM: "Vek'n swings wildly. He's clearly enjoying himself, but not accomplishing much."

[As combat continues, Eric the GM informs us that we must make reflex saves.]
Stuart: "Does this count as a spell or supernatural ability?"
Eric the GM: "No, it counts as a hand grenade."

[We take out the breaching party in less than a minute. Huzzah!]
Vek'n of Plaugg: "Plaugg blesses your adequate battle skills!"

[The PCs want to check out the breaching pod, but we have some prisoners who should probably not get away.]
Yalia: "Vek'n, can you watch these guys?"
Vek'n of Plaugg: "They shall not escape my mostly unflinching gaze!"

[We send Anton's demon in first.]
Eric the GM: "Acrobatics check?"
Stuart: "Why? ...Oh, right, gravity is gonna change."
Julie: (delighted) "I have zero-G maneuver! I knew it would come in handy!"

[We learn nothing of interest from the breaching pod. Time to question the prisoners.]
Anton Dregari: "Normally I'd make polite small talk and then let her threaten you, but we don't have time."

[The soldiers, having had their helmets removed, apparently remember nothing of the last several weeks and think they're in some sort of afterlife.]
Yalia: "So, as expected, the shock troops know nothing."

[We run into some security, who have come to take the prisoners off our hands.]
Yalia: "Does Command need me to get anyone off?"
Security Guard: "From what I know of you, ma'am, you're best off doing whatever it is you do."

[We teleport to Lena's quarters, which is guarded by more armored soldiers. The bad news is that the one life sign we assumed to be Lena is in fact a soldier, whom we dispatch. The other bad news is that none of us realized the main door to the hallway was still open, so the soldiers outside have heard the whole thing.]
Julie: "Let's start by closing the door and discussing our options."
Sabina: "No, let's kill them."
Julie: "...Okay."

[We fight the soldiers in the hallway.]
Vek'n of Plaugg: "For Plaugg!" *triple-criticals*
Fox: "Would it be insulting to imply that that was more than adequate?"

[We take out the guards in the hallway and consider our next options.]
Fox: "What about Morris?"
Anton Dregari: "No, we're not getting him involved. This is the worst time to get him involved."

[Having determined Lena was killed in the fighting, we decided to question the soldier who was rifling through her stuff.]
Yalia: "What are you looking for?"
Soldier: "For Nidhogg!"
Julie: "He's gonna explode, isn't he?"
Eric the GM: "Yes!"

[We flip through the exterior cameras outside the station and discover something in Sector 7.]
Eric the GM: "You've heard of this. It is a bad thing."

[The thing is the Loch Nebula Monster, a multidimensional force of... well, of something bad, anyway.]
Eric the GM: "It tends to eat small planets."

[We consider what might be done about the Loch Nebula Monster.]
Stuart: "We can't take out a creature that size."
Eric the GM: "Not with blasters."

[We reach the gate room to ensure that everyone is being evacuated off the station. Sadly, there seems to be some sort of dimensional anchor in place that's stopping the Sheppard Gate from function. It also, apparently, is blocking all plane shifts, including Yalia's.]
Yalia: "I don't think I can get out either."
Fox: "That reduces our options considerably."

[We inform Jim that we will be attempting to lift the dimensional anchor. Jim agrees to start gating people away, including Anton's students, as soon as we do. Anton gives his wards some final instructions.]
Anton Dregari: "Be good. Don't fuck up my world. Low key."
Student: "Got it -- pretend to be the Norse god of mischief."

[The dimensional anchor is apparently being generated from one of the largest enemy ships.]
Anton Dregari: (excited) "I've never taken out a capital ship before!"

[We go to C&C while Vek'n and Lord Dregari go to the armory to try to find us some explosives.]
Yalia: "May Plaugg's mediocre blessing be upon you."
Vek'n of Plaugg: "And you!"
Fox: "May we carry out our missions adequately!"

[Having informed C&C of what we're planning to do, they give us authorization to get massive explosives from the armory. But everyone's understandably a little twitchy.]
Eric the GM: "You teleport to the armory. They don't shoot you, but they are still clearly pointing weapons at you."

[Once it's clear we're not going to be shot by the armory guards...]
Soldier: "What are you here for?"
Anton Dregari: "The biggest bomb you have."

[We're allowed entrance to the armory.]
Anton Dregari: "Leave the door open. In a minute there will be a warforged riding a zombie. They're with us."

[We find the armory chief, a fire giant with a massive forge.]
Chief: "How can I help you?"
Anton Dregari: "We're dropping a bomb on the biggest ship."
Chief: "A fine idea."
Anton Dregari: "What do you have for us?"
Chief: "Oh, I have something for you!" *grins*

[The chief has two suitcase-sized bombs, each with a yield of 80-100 megatons of TNT, solid with a single button on the top of each.]
Chief: "Push the button. Get far away."

[We try to figure out if there are any weapons we should be taking to board the enemy ship.]
Anton Dregari: (to Fox) "Wait -- you've seen dragons in action! You don't need a gun!"

[We teleport to the enemy ship. Sadly, we don't really have time to scry it first, so we're going in blind.]
Eric the GM: "Random luck die -- what part of the ship do you appear in?"
Stuart: "The comfy and relaxing part?"

[We appear in a barracks. Using a device the Chief gave to us for precisely this purpose, we shred all the soldiers in the room to pieces, while remaining unharmed ourselves. The room, however, is somewhat worse for wear.]
Sabina: "Are there any consoles in here?"
Eric the GM: "Not anymore."

[We make it through the enemy ship to the dimensional anchor generator and prepare to activate the bombs.]
Anton Dregari: "Just in case this doesn't work and we all die, I just want you to know... this is not how I wanted to go."

[We prepare to activate the bombs.]
Eric the GM: "If this were a normal narrative story, this dramatic moment is precisely when you'd expect the villain to show up and disrupt your plans. Funny, then, that no one does."

[With the massive explosion on the capital ship, the dimensional anchor is down and people can leave Universe 1. Sadly, however, URDR station seems to have lost thrusters and is slowly drifting towards the edge of the universe. We consider if there's anything else we can do before we leave.]
Fox: "Is there anything we absolutely want from the vaults."
Yalia: "Yes. But no."

[While we were away, the combination of boarding parties and weapons fire has caused massive death to URDR staff.]
Anton Dregari: "We can avenge people later."
Fox: "Oh, there will be plenty of avenging!"

[We head to Mission Control, where we find a large shadow creature giving instructions to more armored soldiers. We consider engaging it for a moment before deciding that would be a dumb idea.]
Stuart: "We go to C&C."
Eric the GM: "So you don't engage the creature? I guess I didn't need those stats after all. Saves me the trouble."

[It turns out that C&C has been ripped off the station, making it impossible to reengage the thrusters. Instead, we make our way to the URDR vaults and discover ourselves surrounded by enemy soldiers.]
Julie: "We all have our rings of fire resistance, right?"
Eric the GM: "Yes."
Julie: "Now might be an ideal time for a fireball!"

[Inside the vault, holding the Orb of the Stargazer, is a man who is not Garalaine Morgaustan.]
Stuart: "It's Jonathan Pryce. We can't hurt him!"
Eric the GM: "When you last saw Ned the Hog Farmer..."

[It turns out that Ned the Hog Farmer is actually Nidhogg, the force behind this entire invasion, and somehow connected to the Orb of the Stargazer.]
Fox: "Is Morgaustan working for you?"
Nidhogg: "More or less."

[Nidhogg offers us a job creating new universes.]
Fox: "Will we be destroying universes or rebuilding them?"
Nidhogg: "Well, you know how it is: out with the old and in with the new."

[As we leave Universe 1, Yalia's plane shift is redirected into an airlock, where we encounter Morgaustan standing outside and gloating.]
Garalaine Morgaustan: "I just wanted you to know it was me. This is for destroying my tower."

[We manage to escape the airlock using the combination Morris gave Yalia and plane shift to Anton Dregari's homeworld. We scry back into Universe 1 just in time to see the station pulled towards the edge of the universe and destroyed.]
Yalia: "So, I guess we're not URDR agents anymore."
Anton Dregari: "Yes, we are."
Yalia: "But URDR doesn't exist anymore."
Anton Dregari: "Yes, it does."

[As we all take a bit of a breather...]
Stuart: "Well, we have time to consider our next move."
Sabina: "Do we?"
Stuart: "When the GM says we're done for the night..."

[We consider our next move.]
Sabina: "We're not getting promoted after this, are we?"
Stuart: "There's nowhere to really be promoted to."
Eric the GM: "For all you know, you're the top of the command structure."

[On the other hand, we are not alone.]
Staurt: "Of all the healers for us to save, we got Vek'n."

[More consideration.]
Staurt: "Technically, if we wanted to take over a world, mine is ripe for the picking."

[And yet more.]
Anton Dregari: "I want to crush them, completely and utterly. Is that an unreasonable desire?"

[URDR may be gone, but the mission continues.]
Anton Dregari: "Someone does need to protect the multiverse."
Yalia: (unconvinced) "Mmm-hmm..."

[How to go about continuing our mission?]
Anton Dregari: "Step one: we have to build mind-controlling armor!"

[Yalia suggests that with her knowledge and abilities, she could make a ridiculous amount of money very quickly, with the small side-effect of potentially destabilizing several universes' economies.]
Eric the GM: "No one says you need to wait a full two meals to resort to barbarism..."

[With the destruction of URDR headquarters, there's something of a power vacuum.]
Anton Dregari: "If it comes to that, we can create a new organization to police the multiverse, one whose name doesn't sound suspiciously like 'murder'."

[Continuing the thought...]
Anton Dregari: "We could become really effective, go back in time, found URDR, and become the Four!"
Eric the GM: *smirks*
Stuart: "Could you just tell me if I'm right?!"
Eric the GM: "I can honestly say that's not how I wrote the story."

[We consider the idea that we might become the Four.]
Eric the GM: "There are universes in which there is time travel..."
Julie: "But only within that one verse, right?"
Eric the GM: "Well, that's an interesting question."


And that's it for this time! Next time, rebels without a cause! Well, actually, we have quite a firm cause, just no infrastructure to back it up. But that's never stopped us before...